Dublin and Belfast based artist Constance Keane works under the name Fears. Continuing on from previous projects, Fears has put out a handful of dark and electronic tinged tracks over the years. Now, after a period away, she has returned with a new track ‘h_always’, opening up her own mental health issues.
Through ‘h_always’, Fears tells her own story that culminated in a stay in psychiatric hospital in Autumn last year. The track itself was written and recorded in the hospital’s music room. An incredibly minimalist production leaves the focus on quiet guitar and Fears’ vocals. It’s a stunning, emotive and deeply ethereal track, accompanied by a video by Clodagh Farrelly, where she sings about the “hospital hallways” and her own emotions. For Fears, this music room became a refuge.
“I initially started going there to cry, but soon started picking up the instruments and making anything from reflective pop music to aggressive punk. You don’t have to be “good” at anything in hospital. You’re there, and you’re doing something, and that’s enough. Creative expression is there for us when it feels like nothing makes sense. Creativity doesn’t have to make sense.”
#####Content note: suicide and self harm#####
Further opening up on her own struggle, “In Autumn 2017, following a traumatic event, I became acutely suicidal and tried to die. A whole bunch of times. For weeks. It was horrendous, not only for me, but for my family also. In a few seconds, I transformed into an unrecognisable being.” To read her story in full, click here.
Through ‘h_always’, Fears is hoping to shine on mental health and the importance of mental health facilities, where even a music room proved to be an important resource.
If you’ve been affected by Fears’ story, contact Samaritans on 116 123.
